This article is devoted to those food companies that love playing God with their “unique” flavors.
1. Oreo – If you winced at the candy corn Oreos of last Halloween you haven’t seen anything yet. The latest flavor to premier soon in a Walmart near you is, get this, chocolate chip cookie dough. Wait, let me get this straight. Are you saying you’re going to fill a sandwich cookie with another kind of cookie? Isn’t that kind of like cannibalism? What has the world come to? Whatever you know you’ll buy it anyway.
2. Lays – Chicken and waffles, dill pickle and now chocolate. What will they think of next? Well probably not much since the company seems to have delegated the task of coming up with new flavors to the masses. Brace yourselves people. This won’t be pretty.
3. Kit Kat – With flavors like green tea, soy sauce, and baked potato, we’re not sure if Japan has a firm understanding of the word “candy.” There is a myriad of these odd flavors that only appear in Japan. Do I detect a bit of favoritism, Kit Kat? Come on, we’re Americans – we eat chicken out of buckets. I think we can handle some strawberry flavored candy bars.
4. Smirnoff/ Pinnacle – When you hear the word “Vodka” what image comes to mind? Perhaps you imagine a muscular, one-eyed Russian man with a cobra tattoo on his neck and more enemies than teeth. Perhaps this fierce image is exactly the reason why whipped cream and cotton candy flavored vodka exists. Go ahead and tease Vlad about his drink. We dare you.
5. Jelly Belly – Dr. Pepper, Buttered Popcorn, Toasted marshmallow, you name it and Jelly Belly probably has a bean for it. Are they crazy? Probably. But the fact of the matter is they’ve got flavors down to a science. Even if some of them make you shudder, with 50 flavors to choose from there’s sure to be a few that tickle your fancy. We think that’s pretty sweet.
6. Ben & Jerry’s – This company is known more for its wild titles than flavors. That said, flavors like White Russian, Pumpkin Cheesecake, and Cinnamon bun give the industry high marks for originality. As for taste, we’ll let you be the judge.
7. Pop-Tarts – With crowd favorites like red velvet cake, peanut butter, and oatmeal (for you nostalgic types) it’s no wonder Pop-Tarts still holds the title of favorite breakfast pastry. Don’t worry Pop-Tarts, Nutella wishes it was as cool as you.